Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Tired!

Sunday my sister and I traveled to the Chicago area for our Grandmothers funeral. We left after lunch on Sunday. The two of us just went, since we really didn't know our Grandmother that well. My boys had only seen her a few times. Lots of issues in Mom's family. Please pray for the family, there are lots of "feelings" there that get between them. Grandma and Grandpa had 10, children 6 of which died at a young age from Cystic Fibrosis. I always thought they died at birth, but many of them lived until about 10-11 years old. Okay, that would explain the bitterness in my Grandma. She was not a believer in the soviergnty of God, and I'm sure it made it that much harder to deal with. Not that it wouldn't be difficult for any one. You understand what I'm trying to say, I hope. Grandma was a faithful Catholic. She had a nice funeral service. Lots of people there. Mom made the comment that Grandma had lots of friends because she was always nice to people who were not her family. That was very sad to me. Obviously you can see there are LOTS of issues in the family, and I pray that with God's help I will not be as bitter as the rest. Actually, God has helped so much in this area. He has given me such a strong desire to break the cycle of abuse, and all that jazz, and live a life that would glorify him. If it was not for God, there is no telling where I'd be. He has brought me so far. I have had the desire since my first child was born to be the "best granmother" a child could possible want. Selfish? Oh well, with God's help I will be that some day. I long for the day my boys grow up and get married and love to come and visit. Okay, I'm not ready for them to really get married yet, but you understand. Okay, now that I've made people see that I'm crazy at times, enough. I will close this with the request for prayer for our family, this is a hard time for all of them, especially with the ill fellings that they hold. I pray that God will give them comfort during this time of loss, and show them that he cand help us overcome this cycle. I'm such a rambler. Sorry!!

My sister and I got in at 2 am this morning. Of course since I'd not seen my husband in 2 days (yesterday was extremely busy), I had to sit up and talk to him for a while, I went to bed at 3 am. I had to be at work at 7 am. I was a little late, and they were totally understanding of that. Zach was in my bed at 5 am, wow. I picked the boys up from school, they were happy to see me--of course that made me feel good. We did homework, fFixed supper (leftover Jordan meal), picked the mess, and now I'm TIRED!!! It has finally hit me. God helped me through this day, I prayed that he would. How wonderful, I made it with his help, absolutely not by my own self. He is so absolutely wonderful. Well, tata for now. I'm going to bed in a few minutes.

2 comments:

Heather said...

Ohhh, bless your heart you must be worn out. I said a prayer for you!!

Karen said...

Melissa...I'm so sorry...I didn't know you had lost your grandma. I really enjoyed hearing about Jordan's meal...he's becoming quite a young man! Let's get together soon! I miss you.

Love and prayers...

Karen